How NOT to do too much
Tips for how to create more space and time for yourself

How NOT to do too much
Are you busy? Though so. Is your mind full to the brim with things to do and things to worry about? Yep, though so too. Do you have a feeling that ‘you never get there’, that is, to the end of the line of all the things you need to do? You are not alone. Far from it in fact. There are many expressions for how you feel: overwhelmed, crazy busy, totally bogged down etc. There is no need for me to make the list longer, as I know that you will get it anyway.
The scenario might be something like this: you have a full or part time job (or run a business), two children, a husband/wife/partner, a house with garden, two cars, a dog and elderly parents who need help. Things you need to do: get the children to school, go to work, do what is required of you at work, pick up children from school, take them to training or other activities, make dinner, walk the dog, clean up, do the laundry, garden, repairs on the house/get professional help in. Then: meet up with friends and family, help a relative or friend, organise various activities and appointments, and doing some self-care (for many people this drops of the list!). I think that by just writing this my blood pressure went up! Just think what it does to yours if this is your life situation.
And just because I am a yoga and meditation teacher it doesn’t mean that I am relaxing all day. I still have a business to run and a lot to do. A few times I have reached a point when I have just simply had to stop. This happened last week. I woke up and felt very, very tired. After breakfast I did my usual thing of starting up the computer and answering my emails. And then I felt that I could not spend another minute working at my desk. I had come to a complete stop. So, I turned off all screens and just rested. Went for a slow, gentle walk in nature, had a nap, meditated, wrote in my journal and just simply rested. The next day I felt fine again.
So why do we allow ourselves to get to a point of exhaustion? And more importantly, what can we do about it?
One problem is that we often unconsciously just ‘keep going’ regardless. We don’t take the time to think about what we are doing and how it is affecting us. We just keep working beyond our capacity and we are not fully conscious of what we are doing.
Ultimately, putting constant pressure on ourselves can result in workaholism, almost like an addiction. It can be interesting to look at the deeper meaning of such a behaviour. Where does it come from? Are you trying to prove something? Is it connected to a sense of a lack of self-worth?
Let’s look at what you can do to solve this.
Stop.
Just simply stop (that’s what I did). I know this may not be easy, but if you are already exhausted, how can you physically, mentally and emotionally go on? Take a day, a weekend, a few hours or even one hour to rest. Turn off all screens and withdraw from the craziness. Just simply rest.
Accept that you can’t do everything.
None of us are super-humans and we all have a limit to our capacity. Accept the fact that you may never be able to do everything. You may have to compromise or completely let go of certain things. Accept that things are not perfect and that you are not perfect. Just simply accept that and stop pushing.
Plan your time
Look at your diary and see what is realistic. For example, is it realistic to have three evening meetings in one week (on top of your full-time job), followed by a weekend when friends are visiting and then in between this helping out at your local charity. Be aware of when there seems to be too many things going on in a short space of time. I have learnt this the hard way. Planning to many things and then a week after that getting very tired or ill. Be careful how you use your energy.
Plan in proper relaxation time
It may be unlikely that you take time for yourself unless you plan it in. How could that look? I recently talked to 80-year-old women who said that she made sure she had at least one hour per day just for herself. She would read, rest or meditate during that time. Personally, I need more than one hour per day for self-care and relaxation, so I make sure it is more like two hours and at weekends more. I would write in my journal, read, talk to a friend, sleep, meditate, take a walk in nature, do some work in the garden. Sometimes me and my partner read something inspirational to each other or just sit and watch the open fire. Another favourite is a bath surrounded with candles.
Don’t be a people pleaser
Learn to say no. When you realise that you are already tired or don’t have time, don’t agree to do even more things. You don’t have to do everything for everyone to be loved. Love yourself enough to say no when you need to.
Prioritise
Take a broader view of your life and your current situation. What is important to you – now and in the future? It could be that the book club on Wednesdays are a priority. Or your yoga class (keeps you sane!). Or spending time with your dad. Or your meditation session.
Long term it may be your health and sanity that matters most.
So why not take a piece of paper and write down what is important to you and what you can let go of - today.
Find my free recorded Meditations here
https://insighttimer.com/rosemariesorokin










